Video of the Year? Video of the Year.

If this doesn't still give you goosebumps seven months after the fact and have you starting impromptu USA!USA!USA! chants at work, well, then you are a shitty American.

Grindhouse

I think I may have missed the boat entirely on this one.

Grindhouse is a double feature released as two feature length films by Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino in 2007. It was designed as an homage to pulp double features of the past. I remember when it came out, and thought, "Oh, another retro exploitation themed movie from Tarantino. Whatever." As a result I never saw it. I am now thinking that may have been a mistake.

Planet Terror has some of my favorite actors, and Death Proof has - Kurt Russell. They were pretty well received by critics, and I'm thinking they would be entertaining. Check out the IMDB plot synopsis for these movies:

• Planet Terror: After an experimental bio-weapon is released, turning thousands into zombie-like creatures, it's up to a rag-tag group of survivors to stop the infected and those behind its release.
• Death Proof: Two separate sets of voluptuous women are stalked at different times by a scarred stuntman who uses his "death proof" cars to execute his murderous plans.

Sounds cool right? Especially if done right. However, the movies also premiered with a series of fake trailers. I knew about this, because they made a REAL movie based on one of the fake trailers. Machete premiered in 2010 and also has been hailed an instant classic.

• Machete: After being betrayed by the organization who hired him, an ex-Federale launches a brutal rampage of revenge against his former boss.

So that's pretty cool. Why is it worthy of a Blog post? Well, last weekend at a movie festival (BNAT 12), a super secret screening was given. NONE of the reviews of the festival divulged the secret title, but it was described as thus: "My favourite film experience of BNAT. The audience was surprised, shocked, horrified and amazed. Lots of giddy shrieks could be heard. I LOVE THIS FILM." Of course I HAD to know what it was! I then used my sneaky sources to learn it was none other than...

• Hobo with a Shotgun: A homeless vigilante blows away crooked cops, pedophile Santas, and other scumbags with his trusty pump-action shotgun.

That's right, another Grindhouse trailer is now a movie! This time, starring Rutger Hauer as the Hobo! Sure enough, the OTHER fake trailers from Grindhouse are now slowly turning into REAL movies. I suggest you watch the fake trailers, and salivate over the potential. Just look at the cast in these fake trailers! I HAVE to see Nicholas Cage as evil Dr. Fu Manchu! I am feeling a Grindhouse marathon event coming on!

• Werewolf Women of the SS
• Don't
• Thanksgiving

All links post to original fake trailers!

Bowl Swag

Who says college players don't get anything (other than a free six-figure education)? With Bowl season upon us, the official list of free Bowl gear has been released. The most interesting thing I see, which must be a recent trend, are "gift suites" for electronics. Apparently, each player has an allowance to go into a room and order as much awesome stuff as he can. I have no idea what is available and how much they get, but I'm betting everybody in a Bowl is getting a new PS3 or XBox 360.

The Sun Bowl will provide the Irish players with the following:

• Electronic gift suite
• Timely watch
• Majestic fleece
• Top of the World cap
• Ogio Politan backpack
• Helen of Troy hairdryer (awesome!!!)
• Souvenir coin
  

That's Good Writing

I like boxing. It just seems a bit more sophisticated (as sophisticated as two guys punching each other in the face can be) than the meathead MMA culture. Icing on the cake is coverage of boxing by guys that really understand boxing and can tell the good from the bad. Like this fight card recap by Hamilton Nolan titled The Pleasures of Watching Large Men Punch Each Other Very Hard. Some choice excerpts...

By the third round Byfield was trying to disappear behind his own left shoulder. It didn't work. Concepcion just stood in front of him, with his guard high, waited for him to stop throwing his flashy, useless jabs, and then hit him in the head with the left, or the right, whichever he chose in the moment. Boxing isn't tricky unless you make it tricky.

Or this...

Medina did not lack skill or aggression or guts or the perfect flattened boxer's nose, but he tended to reach back to throw his punches, like you would in a bar fight, whereas Rosado fired his right hand off his shoulder, in a direct line, which always reaches its target a little quicker than a punch with a whistling curve will. The advantage started out as just a millisecond and grew larger as the fighters tired and the arc on Medina's punches grew wider, and in the third a straight right from Rosado hit Medina while he was punching and knocked him down onto one knee, proving the point. If anyone ever tells you that you can't learn geometry from boxing, punch them right in the face.

Or this...

Boxing is not a free arena in which tough guys pound the rest of us into the ground. Boxing is a tool for the rest of us to learn how to knock the tough guys out.

That second quote with the line about geometry is classic stuff. I wish more sportswriters were as informed and knowledgeable about their subject matter as Nolan.

Who'd You Rather...

Wow! I mean WOW! I just read that after flirting with retirement last year, then changing his mind, Urban Meyer has now officially stepped down as coach at Florida after their Bowl game. We all knew he had some health issues, but this is pretty shocking nonetheless. My first thought was, with Miami and Florida both lacking coaches and direction, what recruits can we steal away???!!! Payback is hell!

My second thought is deeper. A lot has happened in the last year in college football. If you look at the big powers that have dominated the past decade or two, I wonder who you'd rather be. Obviously, we love Notre Dame, but think about it. If you could take the coach, players, situation, recruiting and transfer it all to South Bend and that would be the Irish, who do you think is in the best situation?

USC
On probation. No bowls for two years. Significant reduction in scholarships that will knock them down for longer. Their "genius" coach is in the NFL, and their "genius" offensive guru coaches their rival UCLA. Current coach is an idiot that nobody likes. New athletic director was a sports broadcaster for their biggest rival for the past 5 years.

Florida
Brought in Meyer, who runs a gimmicky offense. Dominated with Tebow, now gone to the NFL. Hit the skids BIG TIME in 2010 going 7-5 (4-4 SEC). Now Meyer quits. In a recruiting rich state, but FSU, Miami and now USF all will pounce.

Miami
Have been down for a number of years. Seems like they were making the turn and stepping up in 2010, only to regress significantly - kind of like ND in 2009. Now they have no coach. They are also a tiny school with no student or alumni support - except loud-mouthed NFL alumni who love to talk smack about "The U" which doesn't exist anymore.

Auburn
Strong force in the SEC. Currently poised to win the BCS title AND Heisman Trophy. Also currently under investigation for some pretty scary potential violations (the Cam Newton ruling was a temporary decision).

Texas
A recruiting FORCE in talent rich Texas. Always competing for a National Title, except in 2010 when they are 5-7 (2-6) and not bowl eligible. Mack Brown has been coach forever, and has not been known to win the big games - without Vince Young running wild.

Michigan
Also down for the last few years. Hired offensive guru rich Rodriguez, who hasn't yet been able to bring his style of football to the Wolverines. He has brought three or four scandals, and he may be out soon.

LSU
A perennial SEC contender. seem to stumble frequently with Tiger Nation calling for Les Miles' head up until they were 6-0 this year. Then it all went downhill, as Miles tends to see frequently. Miles may not last, but LSU is in a talent rich area, and always reloads.

When I look at it, I have to say that I like the situation Notre Dame is in with Brian Kelly, more than every one of these schools - maybe with the exception of Texas. I really think they were an anomaly this year. Mack Brown isn't a genius, but he usually gets the job done. I think things are on the way up, and am very excited about the future.

What say you all? Comments on your picks?

Oh. Yeah.

It has been decreed - December 31, 2010 will afford us the best New Year's Eve party in recent memory. After much deliberation, the Catholics v. Convicts rivalry is set to resume a couple years earlier than planned as the Irish have been paired against Miami in the Sun Bowl.

It presents a bit a of logistical issue - the game kicks-off at 2pm. Meaning my typical, gradual ascendency towards midnight merriment will arrive much earlier than it should. But I don't think that's anything that a fresh honeybaked ham and a whole lotta Martin's potato rolls can't solve.

Anyway, I am super duper excited.

So Very, Very Tempted

Read this, then proceed...

Tomorrow should be an interesting day at the airport. I very much want to tell any and all TSA officials to screw off. Take your x-ray machines and your groping and shove it. But I'm flying with my wife and 2 kids and I very much do not want to upset them, and that urge probably outweighs my desire to test the system.

The problems with all this TSA bullshit, as I see it, is twofold...

1. There is no well-defined process. There are half dozen different security machines deployed at various airports throughout the country. None of them are mandatory. If I say I don't want to do something the frontline grunts get confused and, more often than not, belligerent. If you keep saying 'no' there's no plan of action. There's no cascade that says do this, then this, then this, finally escalating to this. This is a recipe for disaster.
2. TSA officials at the airport apparently cannot enforce any of these rules. As the author of the above post explains, the TSA officials repeatedly refused to go on record to say that any security procedure was mandatory. If I have to do something, tell me so. And if failure to comply in said mandatory action results in punishment, tell me that too. If you're telling me all of this is optional, then fuck you, buddy. I'll pass. Again, this is bad, particularly from a security standpoint.

Failure to have a well-known, defined, and, most importantly, public process that has clear enforcement guidelines and repercussions will be the downfall of the TSA.

I'll tell you one thing, flight or not, my kids will not go through any Backscatter devices tomorrow nor will I allow them to be subject to a pat-down. So if I miss my flight, you know why. Again, should be a fun day at the airport!

War Eagle!!!

Up until today, I had been loosely following the whole Cam Newton scandal. It's Auburn, it's the SEC, I could care less. However, I read a summary of the whole Auburn fiasco that has literally rocked my world! I think even my worst case scenario upon first hearing about Newton is nothing in compared to what may have actually happened!

My first take on hearing about this was thus, as I posted on an ND message board 11/5/2010:

A "representative" for current Auburn QB Newton contacted a former player at Mississippi State, John Bond, during his recruitment from a JUCO. Bond is a booster or closely involved in the football program, and he was old friends with this rep. This rep said they could get him to sign a letter of intent for a "discount" of $180k, as they had current offers from other schools for $200k.

Okay, this is going to be huge, but it seems very applicable to some of the issues we struggle with constantly on this board. Follow my logic, and let's go!

FACT 1: ND has not been very good for the last 10 years, longer depending on how happy you are with brief BCS moments.
FACT 2: Our recruiting has been okay, but with 2 or 3 exceptions, we continuously get beat out for elite level players. Often, we don't even get a look. Frequently, a committed player or lean SUDDENLY has a change of heart.
FACT 3: A representative for Cam Newton offered a signed LOI for $180k from a college.
FACT 4: Although a highly recruited JUCO QB, Cam Newton is by no means the highest profile recruit of the past year, or even close if you look back multiple years.
FACT 5: The so-called rep for Newton runs a company called Elite Football Preparation, which supposedly matches high school players with college programs.

ASSUMPTION 1: Cam Newton got cash for eventually signing at Auburn.
ASSUMPTION 2: Other higher regarded recruits have gotten money for signing a LOI.
ASSUMPTION 3: If Newton was going for $180k, then other players have gotten more.
ASSUMPTION 4: ND is getting overlooked by elite talent, because we are not paying players to sign a LOI.

Look, the facts are the facts. You can't really argue those. I think the assumptions are pretty valid as well. If you believe Assumption 1, then that naturally leads to the other assumptions. It looks like we will find out soon if that first assumption is true. If so, LOOK OUT!!!

I thought that the story had legs, and connected the dots to a logical conclusion. However, now the FBI is confirmed to be involved, and this issue goes MUCH deeper than even the major conspiracy that I conjectured.

As the Plains Burn...

I saw this link posted today and gave it a gander. Full disclosure: this is a summary post on an LSU message board. However, it isn't your typical message board dribble. It uses multiple sources, most of which are linked to actual factual reports. Some of the gems:

• Auburn has been systematically paying its players for decades
• Payment includes cash, unmarked debit/ATM cards, casino cards that allow gambling with high returns (VIP cards)
• Said payments allowed a 7-5 team in 2009 to score the #4 recruiting class in 2010 including miraculously landing the #1 players from Arkansas, Louisiana, Mississippi, and Alabama, as well as the #1 JUCO signee in Cam Newton. Many of these reversed prior commitments at the last minute.
  
• The scheme was orchestrated by multiple boosters and run by the Auburn Board of Trustees through an Alabama bank that was shut down under scandal
  
• The FBI has proof of the whole scheme, which they surreptitiously obtained through wiretaps while investigating this failed bank
• The NCAA is now involved and has warned Auburn, as has the FBI
• Auburn has decided to circle the wagons and go "all-in" to win the Heisman and National Championship, essentially going down in a blaze of glory, knowing that it is all crashing down
• If allegations are true, Auburn will lose its accreditation with the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools, and will no longer be eligible to be a member of the SEC

I mean... HOLY F%&#ing S$%&!!!! If you thought conference realignment was changing the face of college football, think again! The implications are almost unthinkable. And consider that Auburn historically isn't even that great in comparison to even a lot of other SEC schools. You have to assume that if Auburn was running a program this dirty, then other schools were doing something similar.

I'm intrigued by the final line of the linked post's summary. Apparently, things are now moving very fast:
"This will be revealed by the end of the week."

The NEW NDNation

As Ted noted in an earlier post, it's been a tough last few weeks for Notre Dame football. And although I had a self-imposed media ban in effect for Notre Dame football following the loss to Navy I couldn't help basking in the glory a bit after the Utah win so I headed over to my site of choice - irish.nbcsports.com. I like this site because the writer, Keith Arnold, remains relatively positive. And I'm glad I did because it was here that I became aware of the growing unrest with some of the so-called Notre Dame "fans". Negativity appears to be a badge of honor for Notre Dame supporters. It's like they're all in a race to see who can make the negative assessment earliest so they can be the first to say, "I told you so!", down the road. This is the main reason for my media ban. All that negativity just wears on you, man. So I'm happy to see this sea change taking place amongst ND supporters.

The first sign of unrest was a great Raghib Ismail speech at the pep rally last week where he called out ND fans for their "unbelief". It's so true. And I've been doing it for years. It's not until this year where I've tried - tried - to remain more upbeat throughout the course of games. Part of the reason I couldn't stand watching games is because I'd always get that "oh shit" feeling in the pit of my stomach whenever something bad happened. Fighting that feeling is hard. Really, really hard. But if you can do it, it makes a game watch much more enjoyable. And you know what? I never had that feeling growing up. I knew Notre Dame was going to beat Miami in '88. I knew they were going to smash Florida in the Sugar Bowl in the early '90s. Feeling confident and positive is good.

The second sign is the creation of a new website - http://www.thenewndnation.com/ - and its adoption by many current and former ND football players. This site is a direct stab at another Irish fan site, ndnation.com, that I used to follow before I got sick of the negativity and poo-pooing of all things Notre Dame by the maintainers of that site, who proclaim to be ND supporters. The sole purpose of the new site is to support Notre Dame football unflinchingly and with positivity. I like that message. I can buy into that.

I guess my point is this - it's been a disappointing season, but I'm seeing the signs. Brian Kelly is going to turn this thing around. I believe that. Are we going to lose games? Yes. Are we going to lose some games badly? Yes. But I'm going to go into every game thinking we have a puncher's chance. And when we face our first 4th and short against Southern Cal I'm going to pray that Kelly goes for it. And I'm going to believe that we're going to shove it down their f**king throats, that we're going to pick up the first down and more, and then head-butt Lane Kiffin as we're tackled out of bounds by 9 Southern Cal players. Then I will shotgun a beer, punch Kevin, and take a bite out of a turkey leg like a caveman.

Go Irish!

2nd Worst Week In History

The Grotto burns!

October 23 - October 30 in 2010 will go down as the darkest hour for Notre Dame football, perhaps ever. Personally, I would also rank it as the 2nd worst week in ND history after the fire in 1879 wiped out the main building. While that fire put the very existence of Notre Dame in doubt, that awful week in 2010 has put the future of our football team in doubt.

A season already in turmoil, the Irish lose on the road to Navy. Not just a loss, but a complete dismantling. We were outplayed, outcoached, and the game was a disgrace. The next week during practice, a student dies in a tragic accident. Calls for everyone involved to be fired from Brian Kelly, to Jack Swarbrick to Fr. Jenkins arise nationally. We then go on to lose to Tulsa at home. In a game in which we were playing with heavy hearts in honor of Declan Sullivan, we lost to one of the weakest opponents we have faced in years.

After that week, I really questioned if this was it. Has Notre Dame football become obsolete, an historical relic of a bygone era? Many have questioned this for years, and until now I had always dismissed those thoughts. Maybe they were right?

Well, two weeks have passed. A fortunate BYE week in the schedule has allowed the team time to regroup. It has also given me a little perspective. I think we have a number of factors that are unfortunately all converging on us at one time.

New Coach
More so than our last 3 head coaches, Brian Kelly is a "system" coach. He has a way of doing things from top to bottom. Sounds like he has been trying to completely overhaul the football program from day 1 on the job. That can't happen overnight. Our last real coach, Lou Holtz, was 5-6 his first season after taking over a similarly downtrodden team. I'll eagerly anticipate our development next year.

Key Injuries
Not counting the myriad injuries that have caused players to miss a game or two, ND has sustained catastrophic injuries across the board this year:

• Dayne Crist: starting QB (and only QB with ANY experience) out for season
  
• Armando Allen: starting RB out for season
  
• Kyle Rudolph: All-American starting TE out for season
  
• Ian Williams: starting NT (on a very thin DL) out for season
  
• Michael Floyd: All-America starting WR hobbled by a hamstring the entire season
• Gary Gray: starting CB hobbled with a bad foot all season

What team in the nation, at any level, could overcome a group of injuries to key players like this?

Poor Recruits
Back to Kelly, it is clear that he hasn't been able to adapt well to the players currently on the team. However, I wonder about how good these guys are. Kelly doesn't run a complex scheme, but he is constantly yelling at his players on gameday for what look to me like the most boneheaded mistakes. These guys just don't learn! Our past recruiting classes on this team ranked #8, #2, #21, #14. Perhaps we overrated some of those recruits in 2007 and 2008. I think a little time will be needed to turn things around.

Rise of New Powers
Our futility is magnified when other schools are having big success. The non-BCS schools like Boise State, TCU and Utah seem to signify a change in college football. Is Notre Dame being passed by? However, traditional football powers like Alabama and Ohio State are also doing well. Why isn't ND? We all know that programs ebb and flow over the years, but it seems we have been down for far too long!

Conference Bias
College football is completely dominated by the BCS conferences given the current landscape. TV contracts, bowl alliances, BCS formulas, pollsters, opinion-making TV coverage - all of these are controlled by the conferences and their supporters. Fortunately, the TCUs of the world are doing their best to bust this up. However, what we really need is for the BCS system to be blown up. A college football playoff is coming, and when it does, it will level the playing field for all teams - Notre Dame included. Conferences will be less important, scheduling will open up, and the best team will truly be crowned champion every year.

Bad F$%ing Luck
How many coaches in the midwest practiced outside on October 27? How many told their film guys to take the day off? While the death of Declan Sullivan was tragic, and it could (and should) have absolutely been preventable, it was an ACCIDENT! There are probably dozens of coaches breathing a heavy sigh of relief that they got lucky on that very day. Meanwhile, they are all quietly revising procedures for filming in inclement weather. Does anyone really think Brian Kelly told anyone to get the kid up on the tower to film practice? Declan did what he did every day for practice. I can assure you that other than the Sullivan family, nobody feels worse about this accident than Brian Kelly.

The thing is, all of these factors will be resolved in the next year or so. I think we can reasonably expect to see huge improvement in 2011. I am writing off 2012 due to the IMPOSSIBLE SCHEDULE. Then, in 2013, we should expect to see a polished product on the gridiron. In Kelly's 4th year we should be back on top. With a break or two, we may have a chance to truly achieve our Return to Glory.

Goooooaaaaaal!

Ava had the last game of her second season of soccer today. In her "Dribblers" age group for Cincinnati Cardinals, it's 4v4 with no keepers. She has come a long way.

In the spring, Ava had a lot of fun, but her play consisted of running near the action and then jumping around in excitement. Every once in a while she would kick the ball if it hit her foot. Although she knew how to dribble and kick, the whole game concept was tough for her, being her first season. Hey, at least she didn't sit down and pick grass and dandelions - she was in the action the whole time!

In the fall, we upgraded coaches and got an official team name and uniform: the Tie-Dye Tigers. At first, Ava graduated from jumping in excitement to trailing the action and then sprinting back on defense and planting herself in the goal to block any shots. After much coaching from Dad, she realized that the concept of defense wasn't to just camp out in the goal. She also started to attack the ball and made some great plays. One cross to a teammate for a goal gave her the most beautiful assist of the season! Her coach even ran on the field and gave her a high five!

However, that first goal eluded her. We talked about it before games and she knew today was her last chance this season. So we provided the proper pump-up music before the game and Mom, Dad, Molly, Grandma and Grandpa set up on the sidelines to cheer her on. Early in the second half it came - a dribble through the other team near midfield for a breakaway! Just like her Dad used to do on a regular basis back in the day! The look on her face was priceless after it went in - kind of a mix of surprise and confusion. Probably because of the wild cheers from her fans! Of course, once the first one went in, she went right down and scored #2. Now she just wants to know when next season begins!

Done

After a soul-sucking loss to Navy and the predictable internet backlash against Brian Kelly that followed I'm doing to Notre Dame football what I did to ESPN.com - deleting from my bookmarks and habits all traces.

It's not that I'm planning to no longer follow Notre Dame football - I still plan on suffering through games every Saturday, living or dying by the Irish's performance - it's that in the process of keeping up-to-date throughout the week you inevitably get bombarded by the internet trolls and their retarded opinion pieces. I'd initially visit a handful of sites to get the information and scoop I couldn't find elsewhere. But after awhile (usually once the site gets a certain number of hits/day or has so many commenters) it inevitably turns to opinions and critiques - as if they could fix all that ails ND football - and the information and scoop goes by the wayside. And that is just too much for me these days.

Brian Kelly has been head coach at Notre Dame for less than a year and people are already calling for his head. The internet has no patience, and I have no patience for these idiots with no patience. I don't care what Ara did his first season. I don't care what Lou did his first season. It's irrelevant. The college football world of today is so radically different from the 60s and 80s that those comparisons hold no water. You know why Notre Dame will never have a "big name" coach again? Because every coach in the country sees all these idiots that are right now calling for Brian Kelly's head on a platter and says to himself, "F*** that noise! I don't need the hassle."

And for godsake, quit talking about the football program not living up to "Notre Dame standards". Since whenever Gerry Faust took over in the early 80s, Notre Dame has challenged for exactly 3 national championships - winning one, getting robbed once, and blowing it thanks to a converted 3rd and 47 at Miami. Every other season has been pretty abysmal. You want to talk about Notre Dame standards? Right now, our standard IS mediocrity.

Adult Dodgeball

Pretty good facsimile of me last night

So I got in a corporate dodgeball league last night with a bunch of co-workers at a local indoor sports place. Adult dodgeball, as I had been warned by people who have played in the past, is not what you remember from grade school. It's violent, extremely active, and overwhelmingly exhausting. You play as many games as you can in a 25-minute period (a match). In our first match, we lost 3-2, and in our second match we won 11-0.

Let me give you a few stories of our team from last night:

1) I warmed up, ran some wind-sprints, and threw pretty hard against a wall. It made no difference. I was throwing as hard as I could on my first throw, and my arm was jell-o by the end of the first match.

2) My boss (OK, he's about 6 levels above me), the Vice President for Internal Audit, was running out to the mid-line at the start of the match to get a ball. He and a girl reached for the same ball and knocked heads. She had to sit out the rest of the match with a golf-ball-sized lump on her forehead, by boss went right on playing.

3) The other team had 6 dodgeballs and they all decided to target me. Why, I don't know. I hadn't really been a threat, and I was smaller then the other guys on me time (read: smaller target). It didn't make any difference to them. I'm fairly certain I dodged at least three of the balls, but one managed to hit me in the butt as I ran away screaming "Not in the face!"

4) The girls have it rough on the dodgeball court. We would intentionally not target the opponents girls, hoping we could catch their throws and we could get a guy back and them out. I felt bad when the last person left was a girl, but I mercifully put her out of her misery.

This morning I'm as stiff and sore as I've ever been. My throwing hand still can't grip very well, I can almost lift my throwing arm above my head, and my back feels like I was squat-pressing a an AMC Pacer all night. I guess since I'm 30, the soreness will go away sometime next week - just in time for next Thursday's game! Yahoo!

Rock Band 3

Look out Thanksgiving - Rock Band 3 comes out October 26!

One of my highlights of 2009 was standing in the basement, completely hammered, playing Rock Band at 2am. I wasn't too drunk to recall looking at the dozens of empty beer bottles on the counter and hearing Dad swear, "You ran out of f$%ing beer?" Awesome!

So this year, everyone needs to start practicing up for the ultimate Rock Band session which will include warm-up sessions Wednesday evening, an opening gig Thursday night, and a full blown performance on Friday night! I would suggest buying (or renting) the new version because it will be awesome, but also to get ready for the new song list. I also mean EVERYONE needs to practice. 7 players will be able to perform together for the first time!!!

Some highlights of Rock Band 3:

• All old Rock Band songs and DLC will be importable - with the exception of The Beatles. That's one mega playlist!!!
• 3 microphone harmonies on all new songs
• New keyboard instrument (uh, oh - Dad may never put it down)
• Much improved graphics and overall gameplay

I took a quick look at the new 83 song playlist, and just started laughing! I see some mega fun with some of the favs below:

• China Grove (definitely a late night Dad favorite)
• The Power of Love (first wedding video song to be on Rock Band)
• Need You Tonight/Mediate (awesome)
• Free Bird (really, somebody can yell "play Freebird" and we can)
• Sister Christian (I will get whipper snappers to complete the mood)
• Bohemian Rhapsody (just ridiculous)

So everybody get ready. I'll have the rechargeable batteries ready to go for all the controllers, and am considering a keg (maybe 2 half kegs for variety). We can have some fun when the kiddies are in bed.

History

Don't know if anyone else watched the Reds last night, but history was made. For only the second time in baseball post-season history, a pitcher threw a no-hitter. Roy Halladay was about as good as Don Larsen, but not quite perfect. Jay Bruce drew a walk in the fifth inning to break up the perfect game, but that was the only base-runner of the night for the Reds.

Halladay was extremely impressive. He threw a lot of good pitches, but nothing that couldn't have been hit. However, what he did was utterly confuse the Reds hitters. You could see it when Votto and Phillips, and even the sagacious veteran, Scott Rolen, came to the plate. They had no idea what Halladay was going to throw. When the announcers noted Halladay throwing 1st-pitch strikes, the Reds did too. So they went up swinging. And Halladay would throw a clear ball.

If Halladay's control and guile was the story of the night, Edison Volquez not making it out of the second inning was the second story. Volquez had good stuff, but he simply could not locate the strike zone. And he was often throwing pitches away due to his lack of control. The fact of the matter is that any other pitcher the Reds put out there would have lost. Halladay made the question of whom the Reds should start on the mound totally moot. No run support means the Reds were destined to lose.

I do have to give credit to Logan Ondrusek and Trevor Wood. These guys came in and pitched long relief innings of shutout baseball after the meltdown by Volquez. Unfortunately, they may not be as rested for the next few games, but at least the Reds showed that their pitching can shut down the Phillies.

I'm still hopeful for the Reds. I always say Game 1 means nothing, it's all about Game 2. If the Phillies take a 2-0 series lead, it's all over. But if the Reds can get a win at Philly, they are poised to take two at home and win the series. Granted, they'll have to face Halladay again, but I sincerely doubt he'll pitch back-to-back no hitters. I think in the end, the Reds will have to count on beating the non-Halladay Phillies pitchers, because Doc seemed to outmatch the Reds hitters.

A Long Time Coming

BRUUUUUUUUUCE!

Things are starting to look up in the sports world. Notre Dame is 1-3, the Bengals have the worst offense in football, and for the first time in 15 years the Reds are in the playoffs. Finally, I can enjoy October baseball. And by "enjoy" I mean agonize over every pitch in every game the Reds play until my frustration builds to rage and I turn off the TV in a fog of anger and kick the dog. I love sports! Go Reds!

(By the way - Baseball Tonight spent 9 minutes talking about the Rays making the playoffs and 2 minutes talking about the Reds, even though nobody cares about Tampa (including their own city) and the team will be blown up in 3 months because the owners are too cheap. Oh, and with multiple teams clinching playoff spots last night the flagship EsPN channel was showing a poker tournament. Poker. Just two more reasons I hate EsPN.)

An Entertaining Gallery

Today I stumbled across what must be the most awesome unintentionally hilarious photo gallery of all time. The gallery is courtesy of si.com, and is titled "NASCAR Fans at Dover". Enjoy some of the choicest cuts, with my commentary, after the fold...

A Question

And a very simple one at that - does anyone read this fucking blog anymore?

You know what differentiates a good blog from espn.com? Interaction. (Well, interaction and no Sports Guy. Durr! Boston! Durr!) There's a give and take here, people. Somebody writes something. You read that something. You comment on that something. The author of that something receives encouragement from your comments. Something else gets written.

It's the circle of life. Simba dies if you don't leave comments.

I've tried to write quite a few things the past few weeks soliciting comments. I've even explicitly solicited comments by writing, "...post [...] comments". Where's the love?

When someone posts something, write a comment. Even if that comment just says, "Kevin smells". It's a small validation for those of us trying to keep this thing moving, and will hopefully ensure its survival until my Telepathic Blogging Brain Cap™ patent gets approved and makes these things obsolete.

UPDATE: Now commenting is even easier because I've turned off that lame-ass word verification. Who loves you?

Pubic School

If you didn't read the article, here's a link to it. The article talks about a sign put up in South Bend, IN in regards to their spectacular "pubic" school systems. Coincidentally, teen pregnancy rates are also up.

A Hypothetical Situation Requiring Your Input

I'm going into the biodome for 12 months and, to conserve space, can only take three (3) CDs with me (Also, imagine it's 1998 and they haven't yet invented portable music players that would allow you to take 1000 full albums on a device the size of a business card). After much reflection, these are those 3 CDs...

1. The Downward Spiral by Nine Inch Nails
2. The Joshua Tree by U2
3. Songs for the Deaf by Queens of the Stone Age

I'm not saying these are the three best albums of all time, just that these are good enough and diverse enough that I could listen to them, and only them, for one year without getting tired of them. 

As an aside, what does it say for the current state of music that the most recent album on that list was released in 2002? And that only narrowly beat out Appetite for Destruction, which would've put the most recent album at 1994! I'll tell you what it says - new music, for the most part, sucks.

Post your three in the comments!

A Guilty Pleasure

Do you ever play the game where you imagine you've won the lottery and now you can spend all those imaginary millions to realize all your wildest dreams? (If you answered, "No", to this question then stop lying, you lying liar. Lies make baby Jesus cry. Go think about what you've done, in shame, for 15 minutes then you can come back to finish reading.) Of course, everyone has the basics - new cars, new houses, maybe something for the members of your family, maybe a domesticated tiger that could replace your car so you could be "greener", maybe a giant yacht that you can sail into international waters to wager on unsanctioned monkey knife fights. Basic fantasies all. A dime a dozen.

I think bigger. You know what I'd do? A new razor blade EVERYDAY!

A List

If you don't like these songs, we can no longer be friends. In no particular order...

• Life is a Highway - Tom Cochrane
• I Ran (So Far Away) - A Flock of Seagulls
• You Spin Me Round (Like a Record) - Dead or Alive
• Ordinary World - Duran Duran
• I Want You To Want Me - Cheap Trick
• Any song with a robot voice, e.g. Where It's At (Beck), Intergalactic (Beastie Boys)

That is all.

I Guess That's Almost As Good

So the Reds lost (again) last night. That makes 4 in a row. But at least Joey Votto broke the leg of Rockies' pitcher Aaron Cook with a line drive. Votto may have lost out on a chance for a Triple Crown, but he will almost certainly lead the league in one stat - Legs Broken.

That crack you heard wasn't the ball on the bat!

New TV!!!

I have, off and on, been researching TVs for over a year, just waiting for the glorious moment when I would get the go-ahead to pull the trigger. I was deadset on a Panasonic plasma until I heard they had a "feature" that deteriorated black levels over time. So then I moved to Samsung plasmas because they got good reviews on picture quality and feature set and I had seen Colin's firsthand and was quite impressed. Then I saw LG release their new Infinia line of plasmas and thought, "That's my next TV!" Then this weekend, out of the blue, I got the long-awaited go-ahead... and I responded with panic.

Airbags Are Powerful

Football Now, Please

Art - Scientifically Proven!

So Molly loves to grab Post-It notes from my desk, scribble on them, and them give them to people as a present. I hate it, because she makes a mess, and I lose all my Post-Its! Usually, they look something like this:
Hey - she's 3 years old! Give her a break! So today, she sprints into the living room and gives me a Post-It:
So I looked at it and immediately said, "It's a beautiful leprechaun, Molly!" I showed it to Ali, and she said it was just a scribble, and probably not a leprechaun. I kind of agreed with her, but look at it - it looks so much like a little man with a hat! So I used the old scientific method to see if it was reproducible. I asked Molly to please draw me another beautiful leprechaun. She ran into my office, and ran back out soon handing me this:
So it's official: the middle picture is Molly's first free hand drawing! Next up, I'll get her to work on the interlocking ND logo!!!

That's Some Quality Children's Programming!

I've said for years that 80% of the jokes made in kids' cartoons are directed towards adults. Here are a couple that Zoe definitely won't get for, hopefully, another 15 years...

Great Work, Boys!

I read two reviews for the Samsung Epic 4G handset just released by Sprint this morning. Both reviews claimed it to be the best smartphone on the market and went into great detail about the hardware, software, camera, speed, and a few other items. One area conspicuously absent in both reviews - the quality of phone calls!

To summarize, two separate 4000-word phone reviews failed to make any mention of the device's primary function. Am I the only person in the world who still uses my mobile phone to make phone calls?

Jim Gray is a Total A$$hole!!!

I hate Jim Gray. Always have, and always will. He comes across to me as the most smarmy, disingenuous piece of you know what in the sports business. He is all about grabbing the spotlight and injecting himself into the story. I never liked the guy, and when he totally blindsided Pete rose in 1999, I wanted to rip out his eyes and piss in his dead skull - Jack Nicholson style!

It cracked me up that Lebron James picked this punk to host his "The Decision" special, which made a mockery out of Lebron, but especially out of Jim Gray. Apparently, he was paid by Lebron for the "interview", which he denies! Now, the old weasel is at it again.

Somehow, he got himself attached to The Golf Channel, and is at the PGA in Whispering Straits this week. Amid the controversy surrounding Tiger Woods' captain's selection to the Ryder Cup team (because he ain't going to qualify), Jim Gray reported Tuesday evening that Pavin told him he would pick Woods for the Ryder Cup if he didn't make the team on his own at the PGA Championship. He quoted Pavin as saying,

"Of course I'm going to. He's the best player in the world."

Corey Pavin then held a press conference and denied ever making such a statement.

"There's nobody that's promised any picks right now. It would be disrespectful to everybody that's trying to make the team. I've got quite a few people I'm looking at. I would not disrespect any of the players that are potential players on the team, and obviously there was misinterpretation of what I said."

In mediaspeak, them's fighting words! Apparently, Jim Gray was very angry and stood by his story and Pavin's alleged quote. After Pavin's press conference he confronted Pavin, getting face to face no more than a foot away. He went nuts and called Pavin a liar. He stuck his finger right in Pavin's face and said,

"You're going down!"

To which Pavin responded,

"Down for what? You making stuff up?"

How awesome is that? Corey Pavin, 5'9", 155 pounds going toe-to-toe with Jim Gray, 5'9", maybe 150 pounds! I wish they would have started swinging - Pavin with his driver! The best part is that Pavin's wife recorded the whole thing on her video phone. I can't wait for that to hit YouTube. I will update when it does!

Jim Gray is going down!

Sweet Pennants!

This week I attended the 31st National Sports Collectors Convention in Baltimore with some of my work buddies. I was looking mostly for old Notre Dame, Reds, and Bengals memorabilia, but it seemed the Convention was geared mainly towards card collectors. Alas, I was able to come home with the following sweet pennants, which are now proudly displayed in my basement. Obviously, I had them assembled in order of my allegiance. US Soccer would have made it above the Bengals, but I couldn't find any pennants for them. Also, we saw Bill Simmons (aka ESPN's SportsGuy) at the Convention. He sounds pretty nerdy on his podcast, and looks the part as well. But the guy sure does know his sports.

Better Than Thriller?

Okay, so maybe not better than 'Thriller', but definitely better than 'Sledgehammer'...

Cremo Cream!

Like most Heffernan men (and probably Heffernan women too, for that matter) I have taken to shaving in the shower. Shower shaving is a great time saver and saves on the whiskery mess normally made in your sink. However, all the moisture and humidity makes it nearly impossible to use a traditional shaving cream or gel in the shower, and my boyish good looks would suffer from using something as pedestrian as soap. This *points to face* is my money-maker. Enter, Cremo Cream!

I found this stuff at a local Wegman's the other day and have been using it to great result. The directions actually say it's best used in the shower, so that's a bonus right off. It's easily applied. It smells great. And it made a 3-week old razor blade feel brand new. Who knows, I may even try going against the grain when I pop a new blade on. I LIVE ON THE EDGE!

And for you lady readers - Lady Cremo!

It comes in an attractive and feminine pink theme so as to not be confused with the masculine red. Because no man wants their lady to get confused and smell like a man, which would only succeed in confusing the man. I'm sure it works just as well on legs, pits, and other unmentionables as the fella version works on faces.

Astronomy 101

So Ali read my mind and got me a kick ass telescope for my birthday this year, the Orion XT6. Something I have always been interested in, but I never really followed through. The telescope is awesome, but like buying a new DVD player that comes with crappy cables, the telescope comes with a very basic eyepiece that gave me okay optics at 48x power. Initially, this eyepiece was great, as I saw all kind of cool stuff. However, after a bit of research, I just bought a fancy new zoom eyepiece that is considered the best available zoom. It goes from 50x, 60x, 75x, 100x to 150x. I also got a magnifier attachment to double each of these powers. Below is pictued the massive new eyepiece on the left, with the right eyepiece similar to the one I have.

So tonight was the first clear night since I got my new zoom. I took a nap, and then stayed up late to test it out. It was nothing short of amazing! I had great views of Venus, Mars, Saturn and Jupiter. I looked at some moon craters CLOSE UP, and even saw a few shooting stars. My big failure was trying to find the Andromeda Galaxy. I'll keep working at it! From time to time, I will share my cool pics with you as I learn how to do it a little better. Here's my first few. Click on each pic for the original sized photo.

This first pic was taken in May with my original eyepiece at 48x. The rings of Saturn can clearly be seen. Right now, they are edge on to Earth, so they are not as dramatic. I couldn't take a picture of Saturn today with my new eyepiece because it set too early in the night.

This is my new eyepiece at 100x. Look at the cloud detail!!! The colors are amazing. The Great Red Spot is on the opposite side to Earth right now, so you can't see it.

The second pic, I tried to really zoom in at 200x. Gets a little blurry because it's so hot and humid, making the atmosphere thick. When the weather cools off a bit, it shoudl be crystal clear.

This last pic is at 60x. If you click it and look closely, you can see a little blip next to Jupiter. That's the moon, Io, rising over the planet! They didn't show up in this picture, but I could clearly see Calysto, Io, Europa and Ganymede lined up in a row around Jupiter.

Catholics vs. Convicts

I've got to stop choking at work while reading the internet! Yet again, a shocking moment while I eat my lunch. Notre Dame and Miami will renew their awesome rivalry starting in 2012 in Chicago. A home and home will follow in 2016, 2017.

Can I be the first to say "shut the F up" to all the lame ND fans and detractors who said ND was afraid to schedule tough opponents? We now have scheduled series with USC, Michigan, Oklahoma and Miami now and in the very near future. The timing is great too. Kelly should have his system in full-effect by the time we start taking on some of these big boys.

I know we have been kicking around a family trip to Ireland for Navy in 2012. I am still hoping we can do that. However, if circumstances prevent that, may I suggest a family trip to Chicago for the October 6, 2012 game against Miami at Soldier Field???

On a related note, I still have my tattered Catholics vs. Convicts III shirt somewhere in a closet. I will wear it!

Internet Advertising Hits All-Time Low

I almost choked when I loaded up CNN.com a few minutes ago. Check it out and be ready to vomit.

Don't worry, no spam or viruses. It's a new low in the endless internet advertising wars. Verizon has a banner on the left side of the page, pushing all content to the right - actually shifting info off the screen on a normal PC 19" monitor!!! I can't believe these A-holes! The page is unreadable! Anyone with a Verizon phone, I hope it spontaneously combusts - of course safely away from you or anything valuable.

Internet ads started out as inconvenient, with a banner. The next big thing were pop-ups, which we quickly learned how to manage/block. Then, the fancy video and animated ads started to take over. The intermediate ad page is always annoying, but at least you can click to skip it. I recently have become annoyed by the "exploding" ads that move the page down, before the ad collapses back to a normal banner. I can't click the right link while it's moving!

However, this new style of ad has become a SITE-KILLER for me. There is no way that I will be scrolling to the right to read CNN anymore. My primary source of news will now be changing if they continue this trend. If other pages start doing this, I see my internet usage time going WAY down. Man this pisses me off!

These Aren't the Droids You're Looking For

Well... disregard my last post because according to Steve Jobs there is no antenna issue with the iPhone 4. Apparently it was all just a misunderstanding that got blown out of proportion. Every mobile device has these kinds of issues, man. Just relax and bask in the awesomeness that is iPhone 4 - provided you use a bumper or don't hold it just like so.

On a separate note, I wonder how rich I have to be before I can tell people the sky is not blue and they'll believe me? $10billion? $20billion? Steve Jobs is officially f**k you rich.

Ouch.

Well, at least it still has the "wi-fives".

Mom and Dad - I officially rescind my recommendation that you get iPhones. Unless, you're fans of duct tape-chiq...

The Instinctive Drowning Response

As a father of two(2), this is just about the most terrifying thing I've ever read.

Maybe we should consider our family vacation in Nebraska somewhere rather than the beach for next summer...

Template Update

I got a little tired of YouTube videos and images always getting cutoff because our blog template only allowed a woeful 485 pixels for the content section and 740 pixels overall. So I boosted the overall size to 960 pixels and the content area to 705 pixels, which should accomodate YouTube videos (default width of 640px) nicely.

Let me know if you have any problems with the update. I'll be looking to upgrade the template in the next few weeks as well as we're a bit behind the times with Blogger...

Apple Idiocy

Predator

Raise your hand if you love Predator. Raise your other hand if you own some copy of Predator, be it VHS, DVD, pirated video or Blu-ray. If you're like me with both hands raised (yet I am still typing), I have some exciting news for you. The new Predator: Ultimate Hunter Edition Blu-ray was released this week!

So let me just start by describing my love for Predator. This was the first R-rated movie I ever saw in the theater. This is back in 1987. Ian and I had just lost the MSA Championship soccer game and were pretty bummed. Dad was our coach, and was probably bummed too. As we were leaving the field (I was probably crying), Dad said, "Let's go see Predator!" Now there are tears of joy, and Ian and I probably forgot we even played a soccer game!

USA! USA! USA!

I'm surprised they didn't disallow the goal, ruling Dempsey offside.

Holy S**t! That was the best, most emotional game I've ever seen!

• USA Win? CHECK.
• USA Win in most dramatic way possible? CHECK.
• Improbably winning our group over England? CHECK.
• Advancing to a sugary sweet draw in the round of 16 (Ghana, then Uruguay/S. Korea)? CHECK.

I can't say enough about this team. First, you have that amazing comeback against Slovenia that really should've been a win. Then we almost go down early, again, against Algeria only to see another perfectly good goal disallowed. But the team kept their wits and Donovan, a player who as recently as this time last year I despised but who I have grown to love since, came through just before the final whistle.

Special props to Bob Bradley who made some gutsy calls today. Dropping Onyewu to make way for Bornstein? Paid off. And then he left nothing in the tank, bringing on all offense as the game wound down searching for the winner. Hard to believe, but he has outcoached every opponent we've faced. I know I've given him a lot of grief over the years, but... well played, sir!

Now I just need to get my game jersey washed before Saturday after soaking it in sweat today. Payback is a bitch, Ghana!

Group C Breakdown

Big day today. BIG day for US soccer. The US takes on Slovenia at 10AM, and I know I'm taking off work to watch the most important game for the US in the World Cup. I think you should too. But let me explain why it's so important for us.

All good World Cup teams, upon reaching the World Cup Finals (WCF), know how important it is to get a good result in the first game. In the last 3 WCF, only 3 of 36 teams losing their first game qualified out of their group. The US pulled off a stunner by tying England, and that was absolutely HUGE! Here's why:

If the US and Slovenia tie today, the US gets to play Algeria in it's last game, and Algeria is not very good. Slovenia, conversely, has to play England, who is pretty good (except for their goalies). In the third game, both the US and England are favored to win. If this happens, the US will have 5 pts (1 win, 2 ties) and Slovenia will have 4 pts (1 win, 1 tie, 1 loss) and the US goes through with England (2 wins, 1 tie). We would then get absolutely destroyed by Germany.

A tie today is nothing to get upset about - but it would mean we'd need to beat Algeria, and score some goals in doing so. If the US, Slovenia, and England tie each other, and all beat Algeria each would end up with 5 pts. Determine 1st and 2nd place in the group would go down to goal differential. Therefore, the US would need to beat Algeria by at least 2 goals (since Slovenia only won 1-0). Having all three teams tie is not an unlikely scenario, because teams in the WCF play "not-to-lose" soccer. That's how Italy won it all back in 2006 in Germany. However, I don't see England tying Slovenia. I think both teams play that game to win.

A loss today wouldn't eliminate the US entirely, but it would come pretty close, and we'd have to count on a LOT of variables to go through, which are pretty unlikely (i.e. England tying Algeria and losing to Slovenia).

It's going to be a good game today, I hope. And I also hope the US wins, since that puts us in the driver seat. Heck if we win today and against Algeria, we can win the group and avoid playing Germany entirely! Yeah, we'll probably play Ghana or Serbia, but we'd have a chance against them! So get out your flags, find your local bar, and go cheer on the Yanks as we play a big match against Slovenia!

Ugh

The first game of the 2010 FIFA World Cup hasn't even started and I'm already sick of the EA Sports FIFA 2010 commercials.

"Ohhh ohhhhhhh oh oh oh..."

I'm gonna be singing that shit in my head for the next month. Die, EA Sports!

Nevermind...

Remember this post I made a few months back? Well, let me go ahead and remove my foot from my mouth to say I take it back. I take it all back. Sorry, Apple...

I had the chance to play with an Android device quite extensively this past week. And it didn't leave me with a great taste in my mouth. In fact, it left me very much appreciating what I have with my iPhone.

It's not that Android is bad, per se, but it reminds me very much of Ubuntu Linux. Ubuntu is a great OS, but pales in a usability comparison to OS X or Windows 7. There are just things that both of those latter OSes have learned and implemented over time that make them a much more pleasant experience. That's how I see Android at this stage in the game. It's nice, and it gives you some much appreciated freedom, but it's no match for the veterans.

With a computer you may be willing to make some compromises for your freedom, because working in that environment is a not a big deal if you know what you're doing. All the tools and software you need to tinker are provided. Not so in the mobile world. Although you are free to tinker, you'll be voiding warranties on your device. Also, doing the tinkering is much more difficult because the environment just wasn't made to do that. You tinker and you brick your phone and you're done. No reinstalling the OS.

In the end, I learned to appreciate what I have in the iPhone. At the end of the day, it's a phone first and a device second. If I can't install PostgreSQL or download apps with *ahem* questionable content, I guess that's a sacrifice I can make for a phone that I don't have to swear at.

UPDATE (6/11): So it seems that Motorola's co-CEO has promised a 2GHz Android super phone by year's end that will make iPhone 4 look like two cans attached by a piece of string. I guess I'll just upgrade my 3GS's OS in a couple weeks then continue to hold off to avoid buyer's remorse. Seriously, with the way manufacturers are upping the ante with their devices combined with the draconian contracts that wireless companies make you sign and nobody is going to upgrade their device for fear that it will be obsolete in two weeks. It's like Moore's Law on steroids...

Copa Mundial

All the recent developments as teams make final preparations for the World Cup in South Africa have prompted me to make my World Cup analysis post. I have been cautiously optimistic about America's chances this year, and I think you will share my optimism after this analysis.

First, things first... England. We play them first on June 12. That helps, as England usually starts slow. 2006 was a 1-0 win against Paraguay. 2002 was a draw with Sweden. Also, England's captain Rio Ferdinand hurt his knee today and is out of the Cup. He is their stopper. That helps. Jozy Altidore is also nursing a sprained ankle, but he should be fine for the opening match. I think this match is the key to our World Cup, and we better come out strong!

Next, Group C. USA got it's best draw EVER in the World Cup. The top side is obviously England. After that, with Algeria and Slovenia, USA automatically is favored to be runner-up in the group. However, I think we have to win the group to have any real chance to make a run in the knock-out rounds. Can we do it? Well, a strong start against England is a must. But we have to beat Algeria and Slovenia too. I think we should expect that.

So why is it so important to win Group C? Because if we are runners-up, we lose in the second round. Check out the bracket above. Group C runner-up takes on the winner of Group D. Think we have any chance of beating Germany? Me neither. So we look much better taking on the runner-up of Group D, maybe Ghana or Serbia. That puts us in a winnable quarterfinal game against overrated France. If we make it to the semis, I call it a rousing success.

So the bottom line is, our first game against England is the key to our fortunes in South Africa. A win sets us up to make a run at the semi-finals. A loss will not end our hopes of advancing, but will surely lead to an early exit in the knock-out rounds.

Saved!

We don't have a landline in the house (actually, we do, but's it's local calls only and pay-per-call and it's just there for emergencies). We've got our iPhones and AT&T for 99% of the phone calls we make and 100% of the phone calls we receive. Problem is, AT&T coverage sucks in our house. If I had one or two bars I was lucky. It was rare to get through a phone call without at least one drop, and whenever I had to make a call I'd have to wander around looking for the sweet spot to stand. Until now...

This weekend I purchased an AT&T 3G MicroCell for the house. Basically, it's a mini cell tower in our house that piggy-backs on our broadband. Setup took about 5min and we now have 5 bars anywhere in the house and the extended yard. You must provision allowed numbers for usage with it, which is a pro and a con - Pro: leaching neighbors can't steal your shit, Con: Visitors and guests are still screwed. For us, it is a lifesaver.

The downside is it did cost $150, which is bullshit that I should have to pay for AT&T's lack of coverage. But that's a small price to pay for peace of mind, I suppose. Besides Colin called me from our house using "The Network" during last week's baby fire drill and his call got dropped. So maybe our house is in some sort of cell phone black hole and we'd be plagued on any network. At least that's what I'm telling myself to make the expenditure more worthwhile.

Oh, Bornstein. I Hate You...

I love this photo, which ussoccer.com has continued to prominently feature for the past several months. I feel like it captures my feelings for Jonathan Bornstein perfectly via the other members of the US Men's National Team. In it you can clearly see members of the team sharing a moment, laughing and joking... and then there's Bornstein - scowling. I like to think he's the butt of some awesome joke Landon concocted at his expense - probably about how bad he sucks and who he blew to get called into another camp. In the middle of the group physically, but far outside the circle in reality - which is exactly how I hope the World Cup selection process plays out for him.

Bailey, Strasburg - Meet Mike Leake

In honor of the Reds taking the series from the Cards in resounding fashion today, and taking over 1st place in the NL Central, I would like to make a little tribute post to what I feel is THE MOST UNDERRATED STORY IN MLB THIS SEASON!

Mike Leake is f-ing amazing. After 7 starts this season his stat line is:

4-0, 33 K, 20 BB, 3.09 ERA, 1.20 WHIP

After playing last year at Arizona State, he was drafted #8 in the 1st round by the Reds. He had a stellar spring training and became the first pitcher to skip the minors since Darren Dreifert in 1994. That's 16 years ago! Now, he is arguably the best pitcher for the Reds. How good is he? He pitched a complete game 1-hit shutout last week in which the only baserunner got a hit that deflected off Janish's glove. That's right, a deflected ball away from a perfect game.

So I wonder why nobody is talking about Mike Leake. After all the years of hoping and praying Homer Bailey would be our ace, Leake's performance should put to rest any hope that may linger for Bailey to become something that he is clearly not.

And what about the chosen one Stephen Strasburg? He was the most hyped pitcher maybe ever, drafted #1 in the same draft ahead of Leake, and he is still throwing in the minors. I read minor league updates on his prowess against AA and AAA hitters every week, and everyone wonders when he will finally make his major league debut. Maybe they should look at GABP and see the rookie phenom who is already here!