Enough with Lou

I love Domers. They have such short memories. Amongst all the gnashing of teeth over Charlie Weis one plea remains constant - BRING BACK LOU!

I've got news for everybody - I was a student at Notre Dame when they transitioned from Lou to Bob Davie. I was there when Lou broke his hip and everyone was ecstatic that Davie would be the interim head coach until Lou was again mobile. Near the end of Lou's tenure, folks were calling for his head just as they are for Weis today - and I was one of them. Lou had lacked that killer instinct ever since ND suffered the crushing loss to BC in the final game of the '93 season. From that point on he played not to lose rather than to win, and it was simply painful to watch.

Well, we all know how the Bob Davie era would turn out, but the point is you can never repeat history. The Lou talk is insane. It's fun to be nostalgic, but we need to be serious. The game has passed him by and he wouldn't know what to do in an era of reduced scholarships and increased NCAA scrutiny.

Honestly, I don't know who in their right-mind would take take the job at this point. ND certainly won't get any "big name", proven coach as everyone is clamoring for, regardless of how much they're willing to spend. If the job description states that two BCS bowls in 4 years won't cut it, that doesn't leave much margin for error. Their best bet/hope is some up-and-comer that, for better or for worse, wants to use Notre Dame as a stepping stone or proving ground for their talent. It's hard to swallow, but methinks head coach at ND is no longer the top rung of the ladder.

I Don't Get It

I just was checking the morning sites and everyone is gushing over New Orleans' performance in last night's MNF game. Apparently, this was the most points ever scored by New Orleans in a game. Apparently, Drew Brees is the second coming of Dan Marino - which seems appropriate because it's very likely his obscene stats season-after-season will never see him win a Super Bowl.

I get that everyone wants New Orleans to succeed because they were a feel good story, like, 3 years ago following Hurricane Katrina. Everyone keeps picking them as Super Bowl contenders, yet they've only made the playoffs once in the last 3 years. You hear about how great they are week after week, and yet they are currently dead last in they're division at 6-5. You wouldn't even know that the Buccaneers, Panthers, and even the lowly Falcons are outpacing them. Barring a miracle, i.e. a collapse by those three teams previously mentioned, they'll fail to reach the playoffs again this year. So let's just calm down with the whole New Orleans Saints craziness for awhile - at least until they're actually a decent team.

(Sigh...)

Ok, so after this weekend I completely and totally retract this post. The Notre Dame ship is officially in reverse and staring down the barrel of a slaughter in LA next weekend. My new position is why wait and allow another season of mediocrity... or worse. Thanks for ruining my entire Fall, Charlie.

Hilarious and Terrifying

I use both adjectives because watching this video below is hilarious, but if I were one of the victims I would probably s%^t my pants.

The backstory is that the Houston Rockets have an inflatable mascot that will remain motionless for minutes at a time, then spring to life on some poor, unsuspecting bystander with - you got it! - hilarious and terrifying consequences, depending on your point of view. Enjoy!

More Music

I had written off Weezer as dead after their Make Believe album. It was okay and had a few catchy tunes - most notably 'Perfect Situation' - but it wasn't up to what I had come to expect from them. So it was with little fanfare (for me at least) that their latest Red Album was released. Then I heard the song 'Pork and Beans'. Then I saw the video...



Weezer is back! And with mustaches! Stephanie, Zoe, Colin, and Liz - prepare for a aural assault next Tuesday night!

Guns n' F&%$ing Roses!

I am very much looking forward to Tuesday, November 25. After 15 long years, Guns n' Roses will finally be releasing their long-awaited album, Chinese Democracy, and I will purchase the actual CD at a record store and listen to it on a loop as many times as possible on the car ride from Washington to Cincinnati, dissecting every song and taking it in in all it's glory. Chuck Klosterman gives an outstanding review of the album over at the Onion. I think my favorite line from that review - and one that could only ever possibly be applied to a G n' R album...

A song like "Shackler's Revenge" is initially average, until you get to the solo—then it becomes the sonic equivalent of a Russian robot wrestling a reticulating python.

If that's not the best analogy of all-time, I don't know what is. The overall review is incredibly favorable, but, quite honestly, this album could be 75 minutes of whale song and I would still eagerly rush to BestBuy to drop however much they'll be charging without hesitation. That is my level of commitment to and confidence in Axl Rose.

Anyway, you all grew up with the Gunners - go buy the album. Don't pull any namby-pamby file-sharing theft or iTunes downloads - this is an album that requires you to hold it in your hand and read the liner notes. God, I'm so excited...

It's all coming together...heh, heh, heh!

With the generation of Dad's College Football Rankins for 11-15-08, I am now able to predict with high confidence that Florida will play Southern Cal for the national championship. And it all will hinge on ND. Here's how it will go down.



Florida will SHRED Alabama in the SEC title game. Good-bye Crimson Tide. Hello #1.



Okiehomer will defeat Tejas Teck next week. At that point, each of the Big Three in the Big 12 will have 1 loss. The computers (including mine) will love Tejas but the humans will be loath to choose one over the others. Conference championship? Pish, tosh. Adios Big 12.



Meanwhile at the Colliseum, as alumni across the country feast on leftover turkey and honeybaked ham, SoCal will put a serious beat down on the Aspiring Irish in primetime national TV. And in losing, ND will once again pave the road for Trojan glory (see Palmer, Leinert, Bush). The humans will faun over the well-coiffed Pete Carroll and his fun-bunch, vaulting them to #2.



Florida vs. Southern Cal. QED.

We Bought a House

Click on the link below for more pictures. If you happened to be planning on purchasing Christmas gifts for us, we would truly appreciate Target and Home Depot gift cards. If you weren't planning on getting gifts for us you are a Scrooge.

http://www.homevisit.com/mlsTour/select/?id=34516

Ugh...

So Notre Dame lost again this weekend to another team with a decent record and, predictably, out come the "fans" begging for the head of Charlie Weis on a platter. The argument seems to consist of...

• The team is regressing.
• Charlie can't develop the talent he has on the roster.
• Charlie couldn't coach himself out of a shoe box.

While I admit the team appears to have taken a step backwards the last few weeks, it's hardly time to hit the panic button. This is still a ridiculously young team, with a majority of the starters underclassmen. The inconsistency week-in, week-out and their inability to finish off games is a manifestation of that youth.

On the development front, just think back to how bad this team was last year. If you can tell me with a straight face that ND is not improved by leaps and bounds across the board, you have zero football intelligence. I know it's frustrating, but anyone who thought a 3-9 team would turn things around to 9-3 in one year is foolish, borderline insane. A record of 7-5 is what I believed the ceiling to be at the start of the season, and that's looking about right these days. A humorous argument I saw in the interwebs was that the only reason Weis won in his first two seasons was because he had Willingham's recruits. I find this humorous because it contradicts the very argument used in the defense of Weis those first two seasons - that he had developed players that had contributed nothing under Willingham (the likes of Quinn, Stovall, and Szaaamklasdfja) and turned them into NFL-quality players. Short attention span I guess.

As for coaching decisions, you can hardly blame Weis and co. for 4 interceptions and a botched punt this week. Fact is, turnovers have absolutely killed Notre Dame in every loss this season. North Carolina - Clausen's INT to open the second half. Michigan St. - Floyd's fumble while driving in the 2nd quarter. Again, this is a young team and these types of mistakes will happen, it's a testament to the coaching staff that even with these major gaffes the games have still been competitive. At the end of the day, the game is played on the field and players need to make plays. The job of the coaching staff is to prepare the team and put them in a position to win every game, and in that respect they have succeeded. Now it's time for the players to step up, eliminate the stupid, costly mistakes, and start winning some games.

Now, all that said in Weis' defense he still needs to prove himself. I couldn't care less about so-called "signature wins", but Weis needs to take a hard look at some obvious weaknesses. If the offensive line keeps letting a 3-man d-line pressure Clausen, bench them to show them you mean business. If it continues, fire Latina. If the three-headed tandem of Allen-Aldridge-Hughes can't pick up yards on the ground, bench them and give Jonas Gray a try, or try putting Golden Tate back there. And the highest profile, if Clausen continues to cost them games with poor decisions and worse passes, bench him and let Sharpley have a go. Weis needs to send a message that no one on this team is untouchable. Job security leads to complacency, which leads to poor performance. There is enough talent on that roster that everyone should be pushed for playing time.

All-in-all, I'm still optimistic about the future of this team. I think if things continue to progress at this rate, you're looking at BCS contention (just a bowl, not a NC shot) next year and possibly NC challenges in 2010. If you look at any successful sports program in any sport at any level, the one constant key to success is stability. To jump the gun and make any crazy decisions regarding the direction of this team would set it back another five years. We all knew what we were getting into at the start of the season and we all knew the realistic timelines. So take a deep breath and appreciate the fact that you can enjoy Thanksgiving because you already know how that Southern Cal game will turn out.

Well, college football season is approaching its end, the Bengals are done, so what do we have to look forward to, Cincinnati Reds baseball! Hear me out, being a Reds fan means usually throwing in the towel on the season in early to mid June. Thus, the most exciting time for Reds fans is the off-season. During the off-season we can always hope to add a player or two to take us to the next level for the upcoming season. Can the Reds become the Tampa Bay Rays of 2008? Probably not, but with some careful pickups and subtractions they can improve from last year significantly.

Hear are some key factors for the Reds in 2009:

1. We need the old Aaron Harang back. Harang makes all of the other pitchers better. He eats up innings and is consistent. If he were healthy last year I think we probably could have had a 5 game swing in the W column.

2. Young pitchers keep up the momentum. Can Volquez and Cueto pitch well again? Can Homer Bailey become an effective MLB starter? If we can answer yes to these questions then we could be a team to be feared come next year.

3. Can we improve defensively? To say the Reds played poorly on defense last year would be an understatement. They were awful. Moving Encarnacion to left field, and signing a SS will do wonders for this team. Not to mention the addition by subtraction of Dunn and Griffey from the outfield.

4. Speaking of those two, what to do with the freed up money we were paying Griffey and Dunn? I think there is no reason the Reds can't be a similar team to the Cardinals. We have good talent all around the team, but are missing a few pieces. I don't think we should overpay for anyone, because we are more than a few players away from seriously competing, but there is not reason we can't contend for the division or wild card well into September. We just need a SS, maybe another decent starter and possibly a catcher. Get it done Jocketty!


I know I will be listening to the Hot Stove reports on 700 WLW, in many ways (sadly) it often is the most exciting time of the year for Reds fans. Maybe if we make some decent moves, we can start getting excited in September and October instead on only November through March.

Where's Jenny McCarthy Now?

I couldn't resist a little follow-up post to Ian's rip on celebrities that focused on Jenny McCarthy a couple weeks ago. An article was posted yesterday on USAToday.com entitled, "Study links rainfall to autism in children." I recommend reading it for some light entertainment. The actual published journal article reference is from a reputable journal, Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine. This is a heavier read for the non-scientists following our blog.

Let me just give you Ted's Executive Summary©, as a trained and practicing physician:
Autism is a mysterious disorder. Nobody understands it, and a lot of people are trying to isolate a cause. The best guess anyone has is that it (like many, many, many other illnesses) has a genetic basis that is triggered by some combination of environmental causes. This article used anecdotal stats to form a hypothesis that autism appeared to be more prevalent in states where there was bad weather that forced kids inside. On delving deeper, fancy statistical analyses seemed to support their crazy hypothesis. To justify their dumb conclusion, they associated a handful of possible reasons that keeping your kids inside is bad and could trigger autism: too much TV, low vitamin D from lack of sun, chemicals in household cleaners, toxins in the rain, and my favorite - too much rain causes more weeds and bugs and leads to more pestacides. The authors readily admit that this hypothesis has no clinical evidence, and is fraught with potential concerns.

So there you have it! I think Jenny McCarthy has a new cause to jump onboard. Whether she chooses to support weather control measures, moving to the desert or investing in umbrellas, she will be able to hit the talk show circuit for another round. I doubt she will apologize for spreading the garbage that she peddled for years.

RIP, Mike

Today comes sad news that Michael Crichton has passed away at age 66. Crichton was always one of my favorite authors and penned such best-sellers as The Andromeda Strain, Jurassic Park, and Disclosure. I think what I liked most about his work was the amount of research he put into his novels. His plots, although far-fetched, always seemed plausible and grounded in actual science - no doubt a result of him being a doctor himself. He couldn't end a book to save his life - too soon? - but it was always a hell of a ride getting there.

I still remember my first introduction to Jurassic Park. Mom told me it was about an amusement park with dinosaurs. I imagined a bunch of robot dinosaurs in a giant dome and thought, "Lame!". Boy was I wrong. So please excuse me whilst I go dig up my 15 year-old, battered, paperback copy and start re-reading it for the 12th time.

Down and Out

I was very excited to hear the big announcement this week that Brady Quinn is finally getting the start in Cleveland for the Browns. I was not excited to find out that it would take place on one of those awful Thursday night games that you can only see on the NFL network. I refuse to pay an extra $5.99 a month to watch another channel of sports talk with an occasional Thursday night dud.

Anyway, I find it very interesting to hear the media reaction to the decision. Almost universally, it was considered a quick trigger. A bad decision, bordering on desperate by the Browns. A short week is supposedly an awful time to make the switch for a new QB. The comment that bothers me the most is that the Browns failure is not Anderson's fault. Too many dropped passes by the receivers are to blame for Anderson's poor stats.

Is anybody else as incredulous as I am? Since when has a poorly performing QB on an underachieving team been considered good? I checked the stats. Derek Anderson is rated 31st in the league in passer rating. That's behind such luminaries as JaMarcus Russell, Joe Flacco, Dan Orlovsky and Gus Frerotte. Only 2 teams have a worse QB than Cleveland, KC and Seattle. Look, I understand a few dropped passes can make a QB look bad, but they don't give him a 68.9 QB rating! They surely don't give him a 49.8% completion rate. That is just not up to standards for an NFL QB.

I just don't get it. Quinn has been in competition for the starting spot since he signed. You would think Anderson had to perform better to keep his spot. Yet, the worse he plays, the more excuses arise. This switch has been brewing for over a year, so why is it a quick trigger now?

The only answer to these questions I can come up with is that people hate Brady Quinn. It was there in college, it was there at the draft, it was there during his contract negotiations, and it continues today. For the life of me, I'll never understand. He has never been anything but an exemplary person. He works hard, never gets into trouble, is a great teammate as a starter or on the bench, succeeds at every level so far... People just love to hate him.

I hope he kicks butt tomorrow and begins a great NFL career. Unfortunately, anything less than the second coming of Joe Montana or Tom Brady will be considered a letdown by the same people who continue to put him down. I don't see that for Quinn, so I guess I should get used to the criticism that will follow him throughout his career.

We Now Return to Our Regularly Scheduled Programming

Oh thank god this election is over. I won't even comment on the results because it makes no difference at this point - we have a new President-Elect, deal with it. I'm just happy we can finally return to blogging about things that are truly important

• Poop and fart jokes
• Notre Dame football
• The latest in A/V gadgets
• My disdain for pants
  

Now, for your viewing pleasure - a picture of Zoe with crazy hair!

Red vs. Blue

One of the most interesting aspects of the Presidential election to me was the support that Obama seemed to garner across the board. The media touted that rich/poor, black/white, men/women, old/young all supported Obama. As a result, his landslide Electoral College victory supposedly gives him a mandate that he can do whatever he wants in Washington, because he is the clear people's choice. A couple of quick points about that sentiment (which was repeated tirelessly by the networks last night following the victory).

First of all, Obama had a clear victory, but is it the decisive victory that everyone claims? I admit I never understand political stats, but it doesn't seem to me that 52% of the popular vote is a decisive victory. Obama ran a great campaign and he pulled away 2% or 3% of voters in several key demographics that had voted GOP in 2004. He didn't completely change the vote, he chipped away just enough at the groups "in play" to get a victory. One of my favorite graphics of the last few Presidential elections is the Electoral map by county. As you can see, the nation is predominantly Red in 2004, and again in 2008. Some of the blue counties spread a bit in 2008, but not that much. The Dems main source of power is in every urban county. To me, this shows that America's main division is not Red vs. Blue, but urban vs. suburbs/rural. As big cities grow and sprall, more voters go Dem.

20042008

Secondly, I think that the groups that Obama does appeal to are more vocal and and help to influence the vote. What am I talking about? He gets the media (except Fox). That's free advertising and research for any Democratic candidate. He gets the young voters. These are the people who blog, facebook, protest and get noticed by the media. He also gets the unions, which will campaign and be very vocal. They control a block of worker votes who will do vote how they are told. The GOP supports it's candidates a different way. It's a bit less visceral or emotional. It is pragmatic, and has to do more with your pocketbook. Other than the religious right, I think most Republicans acknowledge they are Republican and nothing more. I didn't go to any rallies. I didn't contribute any money. I didn't walk around with a McCain t-shirt trying to gain votes.

I don't think the Republicans are in huge trouble. I do think they need to reorganize the party and tap into the emotions of voters in a way as to energize the vote. They don't have a long way to go. Despite the "big" Obama win and his successful campaign, he won for 2 simple reasons: people don't like George Bush, and the economy hit a major downturn in the last month of the election. Don't forget that McCain was up 10 points in the polls in October before the stock market crash. I propose that any Democrat running on that ticket would have won this election by running even a barely competant campaign. John Kerry, Al Gore, and Michael Dukakis, all former runners-up, would have won in a vote against any GOP candidate in 2008. In my opinion, Obama's most impressive (and important) victory was in the primaries against Clinton. In the end it all really boiled down to Obama's campaign rally: CHANGE.

America is going to get change alright. The funny thing is, nobody, not even Obama really knows what those changes will be.

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!

Forget any comments about the election today. I wanted to remind you of how dumb people really are who cast the votes that decide the future of our country.

Case-in-point, Al Franken is leading the polls for election to the United States Senate in the state of Minnesota. Are you serious? We are going to elect a Saturday Night Live writer who had 1 good character in the history of the show to the US Senate?

He has served in ZERO elected offices. His biggest political experience consists of a liberal talk radio show. He has written a couple of books, the topic of which seems to try to justify his candidacy in a humorous way. Perhaps most importantly, he wasn't that funny on SNL!

If we're going to put an SNL alum into Congress, can't it at least be someone funny? I can think of a ton of better alternatives including Phil Hartman, Chris Farley or John Belushi. Yes, I know they're dead, but I still think a dead John Belushi would be a better senator than a live Al Franken! He did become Senator Blutarsky at the end of Animal House!

As for the probable Junior Senator from the great state of Minnesota... Good luck America!