I Hate the Pittsburgh Steelers

Cincinnati and Pittsburgh are less than 300 miles apart. The geography of both cities is similar, with both resting on the Ohio river. The cities themselves are eerily similar in their architecture and layout. But there is one very big difference - the Cincinnati Bengals are awesome and the Pittsburgh Steelers are a bunch of cheap-shot hacks who can't admit when they are gifted a victory.

I was 14 years old the last time the Bengals played in a playoff game - that's 15 years for those keeping score at home - so to say I was excited for this afternoon's game would be an understatement. I was sick of everyone saying the Bengals were in a slump entering the game, having lost their last two, while the Steelers were peaking, winning four straight. WTF?! The Bengals had clinched the division title with two games left to play! They lost because they were resting almost all of their starters to avoid injury going into the playoffs. Meanwhile, the Steelers were in a must-win situation for each of their last four games - they had to win, plus hope for a San Diego choke-job, just to get into the playoffs. Goddamn, ignorant media strikes again.

Alas, the Bengals' stategy to rest their players going into the playoffs failed miserably as on the second play of the game, the fucking second play, Carson Palmer hit Chris Henry for a 66 yard game and had Kimo von Oelhoffen roll his knee a full three seconds after the ball left his hand, tearing both his ACL and MCL. Adding insult to injury, or, more accurately, adding injury to injury, Chris Henry, the recipient of the aforementioned pass, injured his knee on the play. Less than two minutes into the game I've been waiting 15 years for and our MVP quarterback and second best receiver are out of the game.

John Kitna filled in admirably, but eventually resumed playing like John Kitna. Final score - 31-17, Pittsburgh.

Am I pissed we lost? Yeah, would I be blogging if I wasn't pissed? But I wouldn't be so pissed if the Bengals had been healthy and just been beaten. I'm pissed because the fucking Steelers acted like they just took the Bengals' best shot and won. Quotes after the game from Steelers players ranged from, "They wanted to make us pass, and we proved we could pass on them." to "Who Dey? Who Dey? We Dey."

You fucking amateurs. Not one of the Steelers mentioned the Palmer injury. You think losing the NFL's leading TD passer and team record holder in yards passing for a season had anything to do with your win, r-tards? Why don't we sit Roethlisberger for a game and see how well you do with Tommy Maddox at the helm.

What a cruel, cruel joke. My only consolation comes from the fact that the Steelers must now travel to Indianapolis to play the Colts. I am praying that the Colts come out to win one for coach Dungy and not like they're still at a funeral. I am praying that the Steelers get their comeuppance in the form of a 84-0 thrashing at the hands of the Colts. Or I'll settle for Dwight Freeney tearing off Roethlisberger's leg and beating Hines Ward unconcious with it, then stealing Ward's pants and taking illicit photos of him with the Colts mascot and posting them on the internet. One or the other, I'm not picky...