The Royal Heffernans


Quite possibly the best family ever

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Ohio State - The Florida State of the Midwest


Today the NCAA released its inaugural Graduation Success Report, or GSR for short. According to the NCAA's web site:

"The GSR is a new NCAA measurement that improves the federally mandated graduation-rate by including transfer data in the calculation. It was developed in response to college and university presidents who wanted graduation data that more accurately reflect the mobility among students in today's higher education climate."

Translation: schools were excited because their graduation rates should theoretically rise under the newer guidelines.

I submit for your approval the GSR records for the football teams at three "football" schools - Florida State, Ohio State, and Notre Dame.






















School GSR Fed Rate
Florida State 52% 46%
Ohio State 54% 49%
Notre Dame 96% 85%


As the data shows, Ohio State (the NCAA officially omits the leading 'The' for Ohio State University) just edges out Florida State. Meanwhile, Notre Dame's graduation rate is almost better than Ohio State's and Florida State's rates combined! Bravo, Ohio State administrators, your prize football team is an absolute embarrassment to the great state of Ohio and to college athletics in general (I don't feel the need to single out Florida because it's already an embarrassment in every way conceivable).

Notre Dame may just win the Fiesta Bowl by forfeit - I'm not sure the Ohio State football team could find Tempe, much less Arizona, on a map...

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