Joaquin Phoenix Superstar

I got a tip from an online source yesterday evening that I HAD to watch The Late Show with David Letterman last night. You see, Joaquin Phoenix was the guest and apparently, he had a complete meltdown!

Joaquin Phoenix

Dave has had some classic guest appearances in the past. A few I recall were Andy Kaufman, Farah Fawcett, Paris Hilton, and my personal fav - Crispin Glover. YouTube those interviews for comedy gold!

Anyway, after watching the show live, I was in awe. Letterman tried really hard to be nice and sing Phoenix's praises, but he acted completely clueless. Dave then got fed up and turned on him, and Phoenix started to get really pissed off. Personally, I believe that Phoenix is screwed up ever since he hung out with that robot Jinx in Spacecamp! Now he is quitting acting and starting a career as a "Hip Hop" artist. Whatever! At first, I thought he was stoned. After a second viewing, I now think it was all an act for publicity. Decide for yourselves, but it is still hilarious!

A Victory For Non-Idiots

Geez... I'm on fire with posts lately.

Anyway, here's something that will make Ted happy.

Boom Shaka Laka!

Another US-MX game on US soil, another 2-0 victory for the States. It's getting kinda routing anymore, isn't it. Still, I enjoyed eating more wings than I should have and watching the Mexicans crack under pressure immensely. On to the player ratings...

Tim Howard - 8
A H-U-G-E save in the first three minutes keeps the US in the game. Bonus points for drawing a red card on Dickhole Marquez later in the second half.
Heath Pearce - 5
Good marking. Good job coming forward and supporting Beasley. Horrible job serving crosses.
Carlos Bocanegra - 5
Solid tackling, but still sucks when people run at him. Also can't get on the same page with Onyewu.
Oguchi Onyewu - 4
Slightly less clumsy than past appearances, but still commits more fouls - or, more accurately, puts himself in a position to get whistled for more fouls - than he should. Has no sense of positioning.
Frankie Hejduk - 7
He's just everywhere. Bonus points for an AWESOME two-footed tackle.
DeMarcus Beasley - 6
For once, he got back to help on defense and it made a difference. Seemed tentative to use his speed to run at people.
Michael Bradley - 8
Every offensive pass came through him and he broke up as many on the other end. Oh, and he scored both goals. He's still erratic - for every performance like last night, you get two at the other end of the spectrum - but he showed up last night.
Sacha Kljestan - 3
Did you hear his name mentioned all night, for anything? No, because he did nothing.
Clint Dempsey - 6
He didn't do a ton, but hustled to play both ways, was consistently involved in the offensive buildup, and just makes everything look so easy. By far the best player on the field, he just didn't show it tonight.
Landon Donovan - 7
I usually can't stand him, but the fact that Mexicans hate him raises his stock. He setup both goals and seems to save his best for the Mexico games.
Brian Ching - 3
Pretty much worthless. Falls down a lot for a big point forward. Can't hold on to the ball. Slower than frozen ketchup. I don't know how he continues to earn starts.

Subs...
Jozy Altidore (Ching, 83) - 5
Didn't have much time to show his stuff, but he ran down and held up two balls that Ching probably wouldn't have even bothered chasing and setup the second goal. You could tell the Mexicans were afraid of his size and speed.
Ricardo Clark (Kljestan, 86) - 2
I didn't think it was possible to contribute less than Kljestan, but congratulations, Rico, you proved me wrong. Great, he runs hard and hustles. He also consistently passes to the wrong team and holds the ball way too long.

This is Why I Hate Government

Read this site and then join me in seething...

If you didn't follow all that, here's the summary. In this morning's house vote to approve the Stimulus package certain representatives tried at squeeze in additional language to shoot down net neutrality - a completely unrelated issue that has no business in this conversation. Well, word of this got out and Congress was flooded with calls that shot this down. But now it's back on the table as the bill heads to closed-door voting where it's less likely to get trumped.

Here's the problem - now you're not just voting on an $800B stimulus package, but you also need to consider the sweeping internet reform that was suddenly and unexpectedly tacked on by some jerk. No doubt if you vote no on the bill because of all the crap that got tacked on you'll get labeled an asshole that doesn't care about the country's economic crisis and never get a chance to explain.

It's typical government shenanigans - tacking a low probability bill onto one that will surely pass - and it makes me sick to see people take advantage of such a high-profile issue. Way to go Congress... you suck.

Dropbox! Finally...

How many times have you been at work and needed a file off your home computer? Or had a bunch of crap you needed to share, but it was too big to fit as an email attachment? Finally, a decent and FREE solution has arrived. It's called Dropbox.

Here's how it works

1. Download their software and install it on any number of machines.
2. Put shit in the special My Dropbox folder like you would any other folder on your machine.
3. That shit instantly becomes available on those other machines! I know!
4. Put shit in the Public folder and it can be shared with your friends.
5. Login to their website and you can manipulate the same files from anywhere. Anywhere!
   

It comes with 2GB of free space, which should be more than enough for the majority of the use cases. Anyway, I've already installed it on multiple PCs and laptops and even a Mac (I'm gay) and it's working great. It's the best option out there until Google gets their shit together and releases their GDrive...

Why MLB is Dying (It's not Steroids)

In a week in which pitchers and catchers report MLB is embroiled in yet another controversy. This is usually a time of year that I look forward to. The Reds still have a chance. This year more than ever, we actually have pretty good pitching that could help us contend. Anyway, news broke that Alex Rodriguez had tested positive for steroids in 2003. He quickly admitted his guilt and asked for understanding and forgiveness. So of course, this will be the dominating story for the rest of the baseball season, and at least until ARod retires, as he will be chasing some of the biggest HR records of all-time.

I for one am sick of it. This is clearly compromising the game, and many fans have given up on the sport. Baseball is plummetting in popularity, TV ratings and attendance. Many claim this is the end of baseball. I for one would have to agree.

However, the steroid use by the players and the "steroid era" that is described by the media is not why baseball is dying. The real reason is the dreaded organization known as the MLBPA (Major League Baseball Players Association). Run by Donald Fehr since 1983, this is the strongest, most belligerent union in the country. They have maximized player salaries, held off drug testing, opened up free agency, increased rookie salaries - and all of this is killing the game.

Here are a couple of MAJOR issues that I have with the union:

Steroid Testing
Baseball has long needed drug testing for steroids, like EVERY OTHER SPORT IN THE WORLD! This has been a known problem for decades. Its not like steroids snuck up on baseball in the 1990's! The MLBPA has refused to allow any drug testing under the collective bargaining agreement for years. How many unions do you know that can block drug testing?

Then in 2003, they allowed random, anonymous drug testing. The reason was to prove that such testing was unnecessary. The agreement was that if over 5% of players tested positive for steroids, mandatory testing would be enacted. Union leaders pleaded with players to get clean as this was a 1 time only test series. If they avoided the 5% threshold, no more testing. Reportedly (although they will always deny this), players were actually tipped off about tests in advance! Guess what, they still went over 5% in the samples!!! This is the test series that caught ARod. MLBPA was supposed to keep the samples anonymous, but I guess they blew that too!

Now there are 103 other positive results out there that will put doubt over all players in the era. Who knows how many other players did get clean after being warned. These 104 are just the arrogant ones that didn't heed the warnings. To put the icing on the cake, some clean players have offered to submit to voluntary steroid testing. Those players have been severely repremanded by the MLBPA. Can you believe that???

Salary Cap
Every major sport has a salary cap. Players still get TONS of money in salaries. The MLBPA has successfully held off any salary cap for years. This is the major issue killing baseball. Teams like the Cubs, Yankees, Dodgers and Red Sox buy their way into the postseason every year, and take turns winning the World Series. MLB counters this argument by talking about the Twins, the Rays and the A's as small market teams that can succeed. I will say that these are the RARE exceptions of extraordinary TEAMS built around teamwork. There are way many more teams that have no chance to compete based upon salaries. The Reds fall into this category.

Baseball needs a salary cap to restore the integrity of the game. Teams need to be on a level playing field. It works pretty well in the NFL, so I don't see any reasons to resist. I think the MLBPA needs to be decertified and baseball should start over. Donald Fehr needs to go away for the good of the game!

Billy Mays Here!

HAVE A GREAT WEEK!

Blurring the Lines

Remember a few years back when Kentucky Fried Chicken officially changed their name to an acronym - KFC? The thinking was that having the word 'Fried', which conjures up unhealthy thoughts, prominently displayed in your name probably wasn't the best idea. So they just changed their name to the commonly abbreviated form hoping that, over time, people would simply forget that KFC was actually fried chicken from Kentucky and continue to stuff their fat faces with it. That Colonel Sanders is a f#$^ing genius...

This isn't the first time this has happened in the food industry - anyone remember Super Sugar Crisps? But we may be witnessing the same phenomenon in a much larger scale today. Next time you see a car commercial take note of how they reference fuel efficiency. You are witnessing first-hand the automobile industry's attempt to replace the term 'Miles per Gallon' with the abbreviation MPG in the English lexicon. They are doing this so that when it's referred to, it's just a number that can be compared to another number and not an actual metric that has meaning. If you say that car A gets 12 miles per gallon of gasoline compared to car B which gets 24 miles per gallon, it's obvious what the advantages are - it's a linear relationship with car B being twice as efficient. Compare that to horsepower - something that people just want more of, even though they don't really know what adding 25 HP means from a practical standpoint. That's where it's going with MPG - the industry wants the public to just think more is better, without really understanding what it means.

Why would they want to do this? It should be obvious - the push today is towards more efficient vehicles, which costs the auto industry billions upon billions of dollars in research and manufacturing. They want to bring it back down. So today 12 MPG compared to 40 MPG sucks, obviously, because you know what it means. But 10 years from know they'll be able to say this car has 18 MPG but that one only has 15 MPG, with the hope being the populace is dumb enough to simply say, "Well, 18 is better than 15" and not realize the impacts.

So cherish this moment! The moment where billions of marketing dollars are at work, attempting to make consumers the world over that much dumber...

8 Days of Waiting

Fogginess is expected from weather and heavy drinking

On Feb. 11, 2009 the next installment of the heated USA vs. Mexico soccer rivalry is taking place. And while many of my family members cast disparaging remarks about Columbus, OH, it's one of the few places in this country where the game can be played without it being a Mexican home game. It also means that I'm going to the game.

Tickets are sold out and it ought to be a solid representation of the Red, White and Blue. I myself am planning on taking a half-day to tail-gate prior to the game. I'm getting fired up for this game, because of, as Will Farrell said, "my intense hatred for immigrants [from Mexico]". The US has been dominant recently in the series, and I hope they keep it up. We're calling back our top players from abroad, all for my viewing enjoyment.

In the meantime, check out this story by Noah Davis. I tend to agree that it's one of the best rivalries in the world, because the teams are evenly matched, the supporters have such a passion for the game, and because Mexico is a third world country. I predict a 3-1 win by the US.

It Was Bound To Happen

After Sunday's rather enjoyable Super Bowl I started the countdown to the inevitable question - is Ben Roethlisberger one of the greatest quarterbacks of all-time? The countdown lasted about 12 hours.

Anyway, let's keep this short and sweet - No. No, he is not.

Pittsburgh is one of those rare good teams. They don't have any great players, just a collection of good players that play extremely well together (Troy Polamalu may be the exception here, although getting burned deep with the game on the line while in a prevent defense doesn't help your case, Troy). Roethlisberger is one of those game-manager types who can just as easily cost you the game as pull it out in the clutch, i.e. he's no different from a dozen or more other quarterbacks in the NFL today. Just because he's got two Super Bowl rings doesn't mean he must now and forever be included in some mythical, fabricated "Greatest Ever" discussion.

So let's just keep it simple and try to get caught up in the nostalgia and hyperbole that always happens when you kiss football goodbye for 7 long months...