Video of the Year? Video of the Year.

If this doesn't still give you goosebumps seven months after the fact and have you starting impromptu USA!USA!USA! chants at work, well, then you are a shitty American.

Grindhouse

I think I may have missed the boat entirely on this one.

Grindhouse is a double feature released as two feature length films by Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino in 2007. It was designed as an homage to pulp double features of the past. I remember when it came out, and thought, "Oh, another retro exploitation themed movie from Tarantino. Whatever." As a result I never saw it. I am now thinking that may have been a mistake.

Planet Terror has some of my favorite actors, and Death Proof has - Kurt Russell. They were pretty well received by critics, and I'm thinking they would be entertaining. Check out the IMDB plot synopsis for these movies:

• Planet Terror: After an experimental bio-weapon is released, turning thousands into zombie-like creatures, it's up to a rag-tag group of survivors to stop the infected and those behind its release.
• Death Proof: Two separate sets of voluptuous women are stalked at different times by a scarred stuntman who uses his "death proof" cars to execute his murderous plans.

Sounds cool right? Especially if done right. However, the movies also premiered with a series of fake trailers. I knew about this, because they made a REAL movie based on one of the fake trailers. Machete premiered in 2010 and also has been hailed an instant classic.

• Machete: After being betrayed by the organization who hired him, an ex-Federale launches a brutal rampage of revenge against his former boss.

So that's pretty cool. Why is it worthy of a Blog post? Well, last weekend at a movie festival (BNAT 12), a super secret screening was given. NONE of the reviews of the festival divulged the secret title, but it was described as thus: "My favourite film experience of BNAT. The audience was surprised, shocked, horrified and amazed. Lots of giddy shrieks could be heard. I LOVE THIS FILM." Of course I HAD to know what it was! I then used my sneaky sources to learn it was none other than...

• Hobo with a Shotgun: A homeless vigilante blows away crooked cops, pedophile Santas, and other scumbags with his trusty pump-action shotgun.

That's right, another Grindhouse trailer is now a movie! This time, starring Rutger Hauer as the Hobo! Sure enough, the OTHER fake trailers from Grindhouse are now slowly turning into REAL movies. I suggest you watch the fake trailers, and salivate over the potential. Just look at the cast in these fake trailers! I HAVE to see Nicholas Cage as evil Dr. Fu Manchu! I am feeling a Grindhouse marathon event coming on!

• Werewolf Women of the SS
• Don't
• Thanksgiving

All links post to original fake trailers!

Bowl Swag

Who says college players don't get anything (other than a free six-figure education)? With Bowl season upon us, the official list of free Bowl gear has been released. The most interesting thing I see, which must be a recent trend, are "gift suites" for electronics. Apparently, each player has an allowance to go into a room and order as much awesome stuff as he can. I have no idea what is available and how much they get, but I'm betting everybody in a Bowl is getting a new PS3 or XBox 360.

The Sun Bowl will provide the Irish players with the following:

• Electronic gift suite
• Timely watch
• Majestic fleece
• Top of the World cap
• Ogio Politan backpack
• Helen of Troy hairdryer (awesome!!!)
• Souvenir coin
  

That's Good Writing

I like boxing. It just seems a bit more sophisticated (as sophisticated as two guys punching each other in the face can be) than the meathead MMA culture. Icing on the cake is coverage of boxing by guys that really understand boxing and can tell the good from the bad. Like this fight card recap by Hamilton Nolan titled The Pleasures of Watching Large Men Punch Each Other Very Hard. Some choice excerpts...

By the third round Byfield was trying to disappear behind his own left shoulder. It didn't work. Concepcion just stood in front of him, with his guard high, waited for him to stop throwing his flashy, useless jabs, and then hit him in the head with the left, or the right, whichever he chose in the moment. Boxing isn't tricky unless you make it tricky.

Or this...

Medina did not lack skill or aggression or guts or the perfect flattened boxer's nose, but he tended to reach back to throw his punches, like you would in a bar fight, whereas Rosado fired his right hand off his shoulder, in a direct line, which always reaches its target a little quicker than a punch with a whistling curve will. The advantage started out as just a millisecond and grew larger as the fighters tired and the arc on Medina's punches grew wider, and in the third a straight right from Rosado hit Medina while he was punching and knocked him down onto one knee, proving the point. If anyone ever tells you that you can't learn geometry from boxing, punch them right in the face.

Or this...

Boxing is not a free arena in which tough guys pound the rest of us into the ground. Boxing is a tool for the rest of us to learn how to knock the tough guys out.

That second quote with the line about geometry is classic stuff. I wish more sportswriters were as informed and knowledgeable about their subject matter as Nolan.

Who'd You Rather...

Wow! I mean WOW! I just read that after flirting with retirement last year, then changing his mind, Urban Meyer has now officially stepped down as coach at Florida after their Bowl game. We all knew he had some health issues, but this is pretty shocking nonetheless. My first thought was, with Miami and Florida both lacking coaches and direction, what recruits can we steal away???!!! Payback is hell!

My second thought is deeper. A lot has happened in the last year in college football. If you look at the big powers that have dominated the past decade or two, I wonder who you'd rather be. Obviously, we love Notre Dame, but think about it. If you could take the coach, players, situation, recruiting and transfer it all to South Bend and that would be the Irish, who do you think is in the best situation?

USC
On probation. No bowls for two years. Significant reduction in scholarships that will knock them down for longer. Their "genius" coach is in the NFL, and their "genius" offensive guru coaches their rival UCLA. Current coach is an idiot that nobody likes. New athletic director was a sports broadcaster for their biggest rival for the past 5 years.

Florida
Brought in Meyer, who runs a gimmicky offense. Dominated with Tebow, now gone to the NFL. Hit the skids BIG TIME in 2010 going 7-5 (4-4 SEC). Now Meyer quits. In a recruiting rich state, but FSU, Miami and now USF all will pounce.

Miami
Have been down for a number of years. Seems like they were making the turn and stepping up in 2010, only to regress significantly - kind of like ND in 2009. Now they have no coach. They are also a tiny school with no student or alumni support - except loud-mouthed NFL alumni who love to talk smack about "The U" which doesn't exist anymore.

Auburn
Strong force in the SEC. Currently poised to win the BCS title AND Heisman Trophy. Also currently under investigation for some pretty scary potential violations (the Cam Newton ruling was a temporary decision).

Texas
A recruiting FORCE in talent rich Texas. Always competing for a National Title, except in 2010 when they are 5-7 (2-6) and not bowl eligible. Mack Brown has been coach forever, and has not been known to win the big games - without Vince Young running wild.

Michigan
Also down for the last few years. Hired offensive guru rich Rodriguez, who hasn't yet been able to bring his style of football to the Wolverines. He has brought three or four scandals, and he may be out soon.

LSU
A perennial SEC contender. seem to stumble frequently with Tiger Nation calling for Les Miles' head up until they were 6-0 this year. Then it all went downhill, as Miles tends to see frequently. Miles may not last, but LSU is in a talent rich area, and always reloads.

When I look at it, I have to say that I like the situation Notre Dame is in with Brian Kelly, more than every one of these schools - maybe with the exception of Texas. I really think they were an anomaly this year. Mack Brown isn't a genius, but he usually gets the job done. I think things are on the way up, and am very excited about the future.

What say you all? Comments on your picks?

Oh. Yeah.

It has been decreed - December 31, 2010 will afford us the best New Year's Eve party in recent memory. After much deliberation, the Catholics v. Convicts rivalry is set to resume a couple years earlier than planned as the Irish have been paired against Miami in the Sun Bowl.

It presents a bit a of logistical issue - the game kicks-off at 2pm. Meaning my typical, gradual ascendency towards midnight merriment will arrive much earlier than it should. But I don't think that's anything that a fresh honeybaked ham and a whole lotta Martin's potato rolls can't solve.

Anyway, I am super duper excited.